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What to do when you invite someone round, how to set the table, how to arrange the
seating.
A few simple rules for you to remember.
The first thing to do when any type of invitation has been received is to thank immediately, by voice during the phone call by which you have received the invitation, or with a card if the invitation has arrived by mail.
However, it is usually a custom to bring a small gift to the person who has invited us. It can be a small or important gift according to the circumstances. It can be flowers or liqueurs or a box of chocolates. Let's see what to do in these situations.
| The non binding gift |
| A gift which is always pleasant to receive is the floral one and should be given to the landlady.
Who receives flowers is supposed to put them in a vase in the living room to not offend the author of such a kind gesture. If the landlady receives many flowers in the same time, she can choose to put them in vases in a calmer moment. That's why it is also often used to send flowers the same day of the invitation or the following day, with a card of thanks.
Even if the language of the flowers is nowadays forgotten, it is nevertheless good to know some basic rules.
The red roses must be given as a present only to the beloved woman, while pink roses with short stems are better for a girl.
For a wedding should be sent flowers of slim colours. For the baptisms they should be white or pink or blue according to the sex of the newborn.
If the guests know the house where are invited, they can also send a composition with colours that tune up with the colours of the furniture.
Chrysanthemum are the only flowers to avoid, because are used for sad situations as it could be the death of someone.
If it is a single inviting, the floral gift is not the most suitable. At the most should be given only one symbolic rose with a longer stem or, for those who are passionate of gardening, an apartment plant or one for the garden.
In the other cases could be given a bottle of wine of quality or of a particular year, a bottle of liqueur, a music record or a book, provided that they are selected according to the tastes of the people who the present is destined to. Records and books can also be given to ladies.
It is also proper to present a box of chocolates. At the end of the lunch, the lady should not forget to open the box of chocolates and offer them to the guests.
There are also other small things that can be given as a present not binding: a silk handkerchief, a letter opener.
People, however, are more superstitious than you can imagine. Therefore, it is an obligation not to hit their susceptibility. If it has not been reminded, exorcizing the adversity is a custom paying symbolically the gift at the moment of the delivery with a coin of low value.
When a guest presents himself for the invitation with a box, the person who receives it will immediately thank and, if he has time, he will open it. It can happen that many guests contemporarily bring many boxes. In this case the landlady will thank and will put aside the boxes, to not embarrass who arrived with no gift.
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| The binding gifts |
| Expensive gifts are justified only in particular occasions as a baptism, a birthday, a confirmation, a wedding, the silver wedding of friends or relatives or other particular recurrences.
According to the familiarity or to the obligations that there are with the person to whom the gift is destined, this will be more or less important. Then the book will become a publication of a very precious art, could be given an object of antiquary, a print, a silver frame or could be chose an present among other impersonal objects if the people to whom the gift goes are not well known.
Gifts as sweaters, ties or other personal objects could be given to friends.
The important thing is to never exaggerate. A gift hocks who receives it and forces him to return it at the first analogous recurrence. Therefore, it doesn't imply good manners and sensibility to give a present over one's own possibilities or wish.
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